Ruth

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“I remember so well in 2010 the day I went to A&E with one side of my face completely numb, in pain, my left arm with pins and needles.

The next six months were filled with hospital visits, tests, incredible tiredness and so much fear. Eventually I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, the next three years were hugely difficult. I spent every afternoon and sometimes days at a time in bed, prioritising my energy and training my children to rest when I needed to rest. Walking to the playground across the street could drain me for the next few days. I pulled out of leadership roles and relied on the strength of my incredible husband, friends and family.

I was tempted to feel of no use, a burden, a failure as a mother, wife, friend and contributor to others lives. When I felt this way I brought to mind a verse in Psalm 63:7-8

Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you, your right hand upholds me.

Every part of these words spoke to me. Jesus was my help. Strong when I am weak. He wanted me to rest in him, he would uphold me and my family. Most of all, I could still sing of his glory. I was not useless. I had the Joy of the Lord in my heart and when I clung to him, I was right where he wanted me to be. I was more than OK, I had Hope and Joy.

As of three years ago I am now completely healed.”

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